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I have the same feeling by attending some gatherings

Even some Christian gathering, people saying 'love each other'. But only pretty girls got attention and rest of them all be ignored. It is hard to open your heart to a group of people, only some experienced 'social butterfly' can be good at 'small talk'. It won't help too much if you want to find a true friend or even a potential 'another half'. I still believe in the old saying ' 路遥知马力,日久见人心‘. You have to engage yourself into a long-term commitment, like work or business, then you will have chance to experience a heart-exchange relationship.
--just my personal opinion.
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Replies, comments and Discussions:

  • 枫下佳缘 / 快乐单身 / Just a thought.
    I have been browsing this site for a while, sort of impressed by the fact that there are whole a lot people willing to spend time and effort to initiate group activities. I have never been in any one of these group gathering, don't really know how it works and if it really works. Just feel it is not easy for Chinese people to show the true character in a big group (over 6). When it is a small group, the situation is often dominated by only one or two proactive and talktive persons, others become onsite observers. Plus, to fill the conversation, people tend to talk something in general which doesn't really help present their knowledge, insight or attracting quality.
    Do you also feel the same way?
    • totally agree.Do u have idea to build a small group where people could expose more in the heart?
    • I agree with you. I guess what you could probably do is to initiate some conversation with other people who are "left out" - although it's strange to have two conversation going on at the same time,
      it's better to sit there listening passively to sth you are not interested in. (Just my thoughts)
    • You have to come out and be there to know if your fear is true. You might find that you are the person who gets the attention.
    • I have the same feeling by attending some gatherings
      Even some Christian gathering, people saying 'love each other'. But only pretty girls got attention and rest of them all be ignored. It is hard to open your heart to a group of people, only some experienced 'social butterfly' can be good at 'small talk'. It won't help too much if you want to find a true friend or even a potential 'another half'. I still believe in the old saying ' 路遥知马力,日久见人心‘. You have to engage yourself into a long-term commitment, like work or business, then you will have chance to experience a heart-exchange relationship.
      --just my personal opinion.
    • I agree and would like to join this open-communication group.
      We can have some topic, which everyone can share their thoughts. Through the presentation to get to know each others' values, preferences, make group members closer. In the sharing, each one have the equal time for sharing. The the quiet person are encouraged to speak. Actually many people have their potential, but we need to provide them a stage for demonstrate their talent.